Hypnotherapy for bullying victims is all about taking care of yourself.
Why? Quite simply because others don’t.
Take for example two major places where bullying happens - schools and in companies.
Schools often cover up bullying to:
- protect their public reputation
- avoid lower enrolment
- save the time and money needed for deep investigations
- save admitting fault to avoid legal claims from parents.
Companies often cover up workplace bullying to:
- protect their bottom line
- avoid legal liability, costly law suits and tribunals
- shield high-performing/well-connected employees
- defend their reputation rather than support the victim
- turn a blind eye - it’s often seen as easier. Covering up abuse is often treated as the path of least resistance
- quietly silence complaints. Use confidentiality clauses and non-disclosure agreements (NDAs) to quietly silence complaints.
What I’m saying is I can feel like it’s you - the victim - against the world. And it doesn’t have to be so.
Hypnotherapy for bullying victims. Rebuilding Confidence and Moving Forward.
I’m not suggesting that hypnotherapy can simply “erase” the effects of bullying.
It’s about dialling down the meaning, rebuilding your confidence and self-esteem and giving you the ability to assert your rights: in everyday parlance, not to be walked all over.
The lasting impact of bullying
Bullying can have effects that continue long after the bullying itself has stopped. Being repeatedly criticised, humiliated, excluded or intimidated can gradually affect the way a person sees themselves and the world around them.
For some people, the experience may leave them struggling with low self-esteem, anxiety, fear of judgement, difficulty trusting others or a persistent feeling that they are somehow “not good enough”. Even when they are physically removed from the situation, the thoughts and emotional patterns created by the experience can remain.
How can hypnotherapy for bullying victims help after bullying?
Hypnotherapy is a therapeutic approach that uses focused attention and relaxation to help people explore and change unhelpful patterns of thinking and behaviour.
For someone who’s been bullied we can work on the changing the following self talk that’s developed.
For example:
“I don't fit in.”
It’s usually quite the opposite. At school it’s because you’re popular kind bright or good at sport.
In the work place it’s because you’re talented, better performing than the bully, there’s a power difference, or they send a weakness (you really need the job and they play on this)
“People are always judging me.”
Yes they are. At school you may always be passing tests. Other pupils may feel inferior. Also teachers bully
At work you may be out-performing others and they don’t like it.
“I need to stay quiet to avoid being hurt.”
No you don’t. Bullies just twist the blade more.
“They see me a soft touch.”
Not as much as you see yourself. This is a self-perception. Let’s change this. Don’t worry about others.
“I’m obviously not good enough.”
Usually it’s the other way round. Bullies are scared because you’re better than them. Better looking, more popular, perform better, brighter. Bullies feel they’re the ones being shown up.
In effect hypnotherapy for bullying victims gives you more compassionate and balanced ways of thinking about yourself, while strengthening your sense of confidence and control of your thoughts.
Hypnotherapy for bullying victims helps rebuild self-esteem and confidence
One of the most damaging aspects of bullying can be the erosion of self-belief.
Hypnotherapy can be used to help you focus on your strengths, recognise your own worth and develop a more positive internal dialogue.
You don’t then define yourself by what happened, you begin to develop a stronger sense of who you are today.
We’re working on changing the inner voice left behind by bullying
Dealing with the legacy. Managing the anxiety and fear of other people
After being bullied, everyday situations can leave you feel threatened.
For example, meeting new people, speaking in groups, going to work or school, or simply worrying about what others think can become sources of anxiety.
You’re building up and unrealistic picture of yourself that hurts you.
Let’s stop this. Hypnotherapy for bullying victims helps you develop strategies for managing these feelings and responding to stressful situations with greater calm and confidence.
We’re dialling them down. Letting go of the beliefs a bully left behind. You become more than what happened to you.
In other words, breaking the cycle of negative self-talk
Bullying can introduce a harsh inner voice to you that continues even when the bully is no longer present.
You might repeatedly tell yourself that you are unattractive, boring, weak, unlikeable, the whipping boy and butt of office jokes, or destined to be rejected. These thoughts can become automatic over time.
Hypnotherapy for bullying victims can help you recognise these patterns and replace them with thoughts that are more realistic, kinder to yourself and supportive.
You’re changing the inner voice left behind by bullying from a fear of judgement to greater self-belief.
To be clear. Hypnotherapy doesn't mean forgetting what happened
The aim isn't to make you forget your experience. Bullying happened to you. Accept it.
BUT IT DOESN’T HAVE TO DETERMINE HOW YOU SEE YOURSELF FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.
Hypnotherapy is a way to reduce the emotional impact of your experience and help you feel more in control of your present and future.
Taking Back Your Sense of Control
"We cannot control the things that happen to us, but we can control our reactions to them”.
Epictetus.
You can’t control other people's behaviour, past events and future outcomes, BUT you can control your response, opinions, impulses, desires, and actions.
And what’s this got to do with bullying?
One of the most important steps after bullying is recognising that the experience does not define you.
That’s one of the ways hypnotherapy can help. Especially if you’re experiencing significant anxiety, depression, trauma symptoms or ongoing difficulties following bullying.
Learning to Feel Safe Again You Don't Have to Let Bullying Define Your Future
The effects of bullying can be powerful, but they don't have to become a permanent part of your identity.
Through hypnotherapy you can re-build. Take the learning not the negative meaning.
How can I help?
Over the years I’ve helped people who have been bullied in schools, work, government departments , the NHS and the armed forces.
The goal is not to change who you are, but to help you reconnect with the confidence, self-worth and sense of safety that bullying may have taken away.
And hypnotherapy is a calm way to do this. That why I call my business The Gentle Mind.
Contact me at jamesthomas@thegentlemind.co.uk or call 07787563099.
